I had a great break. It was relaxing and fun, and I was so stress-free.

I had forgotten how the feeling of being stress-free was. 

Then I got back and became a big ball of nervous stress, a ticking time bomb, if you will. 

I jumped right back into work, which I love doing, and then I jumped back into classes, which is stressful on its own. 

I jumped immediately back into panic mode about graduating, grades and a certain roommate situation. 

Even though the roommate situation is being handled, I still stress about everything.

I think when school is in session I genuinely forget how to take time for me. 

Everyone talks about self-care and relaxing, and I do not know how they have time to just hang out and relax. 

At first, I kept thinking maybe it is because they have a different schedule, or maybe they just do not care as much as I do. Boy, was I wrong. 

I came to the realization that all of us are tense in our own ways during the semester. 

It is insanely odd because I used to be a confident person. I knew how to relax; I was not a ticking time bomb of a mental/emotional breakdown like I am now. 

I miss that Katie. I miss how confident, relaxed and fun she was. 

The truth is even though I miss her, it has been so long that I forgot how to be her. 

I thought after break I would be refreshed and ready. Turns out I wasn’t. 

I cannot be the only one who feels stressed out when they immediately start the semester. 

It’s the fear of not graduating on time, or having to graduate a semester later, the fear of your grades, the fear of anxiety and the fear of failing yourself.

I am, however, trying to relax and ease my mind, especially after rediscovering how to relax and what puts my mind at ease.

I learned that people have to stop blaming themselves and focus on the fact that sometimes life happens and knocks people down. 

I am fully aware that line is cliché, but it is true. 

Learning about some of my friends’ issues and why they’re stressed makes me feel a little better because I know I am not the only one going through this situation or the only one who feels stressed all the time. 

It also helps because when you vent to them, they understand and can also give you a different perspective. 

Katelyn Eddington is a senior journalism major. She can be reached at 581-2812 or at kdeddington@eiu.edu.