Sex is common in college. And, we often take advantage of it without realizing how special it can truly be.

Let me say that this column is not meant to be vulgar, but rather to share my experience and to stress the importance of taking sex seriously.

I lost my virginity at the age of 16. I had just recently accepted my sexuality, but my experience was not the typical romantic experience that we all hope for with our first time.

I do think that we all go through a promiscuous stage in our life. I’ve been through my mine, and although there are parts of it that I truly regret, there are other parts that taught me a great deal of information.

My first piece of advice is to not settle. If you find yourself on a date or in a romantic position with someone, don’t feel obligated to have sex with this person. I think that we all have sexual desires, and we often settle with a certain person in order to fulfill our desires.

Don’t settle just because of that. Be with someone who makes you happy and who you truly like.

Sure, sex is fun. But is it worth it at the end when the person you had your experience with leaves, and you never see them again? What’s so fun about that?

I’ve been in that position before, and I thought it was OK. But I started to realize that I was ridiculous for being with anyone. I needed to have expectations and I needed to have standards.

You have to have self-esteem and realize that you matter. We are all special and deserve to be with someone who treats us well and makes us happy.

We could all fulfill our sexual desires with any stranger in the world, and it might be “fun” or “nice” in the beginning, but at the end of the day we all will feel lonely and simply used.

Too often I’ve felt this way, and it’s not the way to live. You feel completely ashamed of yourself and almost violated, even though it is consented.

We should all take the time and wait for someone who is special that will make us happy and make our sexual experiences worth it and better in the end.

Sex is something we all take for granted, and it’s something we sometimes refer to as a laughing matter, but we should take it more seriously.

Value your life and who you are. You are worth a good life, and you’re worth a decent person to share special experiences with, not someone who will just take advantage of it.

Andrew Paisley is a senior journalism major. He can be reached at 581-2812 or at abpaisley@eiu.edu.